@Cpin42
@Gupton68
Never thought I’d need to say ‘don’t lick the paint’ to a 14 year old, yet here we are.
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@Gupton68
@iamdevloper
The software development process
i can’t fix this
*crisis of confidence*
*questions career*
*questions life*oh it was a typo, cool
@120yearz
*shrugs off responsibility*
weigh me now
@NotthatAdamWest
Not sure what my dog thinks I do all day, but based on her excitement when I get home she apparently lives in constant fear I’ll be murdered
@ThaJawn
Phill: *gets stung by a stingray
Me: *pees on his wound
Phill: That only works on jellyfish stings
Me: Oh shit, I thought you were dead!
@WhaJoTalkinBout
kids: can we have a popsicle?
me: *eating a popsicle* no it’s 8am
@JJSummertime
I have this odd feeling that I’m going to be that crazy old lady that yells at everyone to get off the lawn.
From my apartment balcony.
@Naked_Wombat
I’m not necessarily saying that I am or am not a super hero, but I do occasionally stand with my hands on my hips.
@dlockw21
Therapist: Talk about your friends.
Me: Now John at the bar is a friend of mine…
T: That’s a Billy Joel song.
Me: You’re no fun.