For them dirty farmers.
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@XplodingUnicorn: Wife: The kids opened the "private" drawer in my nightstand. Me: THE drawer? Wife: Yeah. Great. There go our Oreos.
@HenpeckedHal: me: wow, first you drew me a bath, now breakfast? wife: you deserve this me: and the toaster is steady on the edge of the tub like that? wife: we'll find out
@noog: Wolverine: You know what I can't heal? Jean: What Logan? Wolverine: A broken heart *professor x starts laughing from the other room*
@E_lok44: I just found a Cheerio in my sofa and we don't have any Cheerios in this house. *eats it