me: can i share something without being judged
date: um ok sure what is it
me: i… i have a foot fetish
date: oh that’s not that weird i-
me: *placing her exactly 12 inches from me* ohhhh yeah that’s the stuff
Dear Electric Company,
You’re welcome. Go buy yourself something special.
-My family, every summer.
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Me: Well THIS is awkward
Priest: *in same dress* Ok. One of us has to change
My work day has been like the movie Sound of Music. But with less singing. And more Nazis.
I HATE when people use song lyrics as their status! It makes. me wanna SHOUT! Kick my heels back and SHOUT! Throw my arms up and SHOUT..Etc.
The yogurt was so far back in the cooler at the store, I almost ended up in an Aha video.
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Me: *clears throat* a boug
My name is Inigo Ducktoya.
You ate our father.
Prepare to die.
The Les Miserables sequel is so much better. Hugh Jackman has knives in his hands and fights a bunch of ninjas and shit. No singing at all!!