Dear Girl Scouts,
Your Mints did not make me Thin.
ps. Please send more.

You Might Also Like


Remember when all bombs looked like a black bowling ball with a giant wick in the top? Yep, simpler times.


and jesus said, “there was only one set of footprints because sandpeople always ride single file to hide their numbers.”


I only eat in two situations: when I’m hungry and when I’m not hungry


If pronouncing my b’s as v’s makes me sound Russian, then soviet.


It’s all fun and games till a Murder Hornet gets caught under your mask.


When she tells you she’s a dirty girl and you get the pictures and realize she meant she never cleans her house.


The best trick the devil ever pulled was calling herself “him”.


ME: *burps a little under my breath*

MY 5YO: [from 3 rooms away] say ‘excuse me’