“Come to me flesh of my flesh”.
*embarrassing teenagers is easy.
*Don’t Walk sign flashes*
Me: [from my wheelchair]: “Okay.”
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Me: I’m eating for two now.
Him: Oh, are you pregnant?
Me: Nooooo. Is that what that means?
I will be celebrating Columbus Day by setting sail for India, landing in Spain, and telling everyone who lives there to move out.
STOP MAKING IT WEIRD
Eventually, some poor astronaut is going to crash into all that Star Wars writing
me: i feel anxious
body: here I make u sweat it will calm u down
me: i feel much worse
body: ok ok I make u throw up u relax now
Yellowstone visitor upset bears didn’t show (Would like park service to train them):
“I think this cereal has gone bad.” *me drunk, eating Meow Mix*
*walks my fingers along your leg closer and closer to your plate of cheese fries*