@Jason_maybe: Everyone has that psycho ex we pray we'll never run into again. If you don't you're probably it.
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@DadZZZasleep: sober me: where’s my phone? drunk me: I’ll never tell refrigerator: you’re not going to believe this
@BallsMcBallski: Me: Most of all, remember to be kind to yourself. You deserve it. Neighbor: If you don't stay out of my heating duct I'm calling the cops.
@daemonic3: If I could have dinner with anyone, dead and alive, it would definitely be Schrodinger's cat.