@WayThingWorks

Finally achieved… world peas.

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@dudehugs

TUPAC IS DEAD
BIGGIE IS DEAD
AND ME ALSO I AM FEELING NOT SO GOOD

@tarashoe

when i’m stressed i close my eyes and imagine i’m on a beach, neurotically pacing back & forth within a very small section of that beach

@StevieKnip

Girls like guys who take charge: ask her out, plan a date, take a hostage, overthrow a government, nuke her ex’s hometown, buy her a puppy

@rawan

my nephew has a new classmate from Zimbabwe and upon discovering that Zimbabwe is in Africa (these kids are 6), the first thing everyone asked him is if he’d been to Wakanda. His reply: “no, there are force fields around it”

@rad_milk

i will not order eggs in a restaurant unless the chef personally lays them

@mereip

*maroon 5 band meeting*
‘Songs About Jane’ was a massive hit, let’s never make anything that sounds like it ever again. do u guys like disco

@Lisabug74

10 signs that he’s just not that into you

1.
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4.
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10. He is a cat.

@SteveKoehler22

The NFL has hired their first female referee.

She will throw flags for penalties the teams
committed 5 years ago.