We're redesigning Funny Tweeter. Your feedback is always welcome. Talk to us at @funTweeters
@Holy_Mowgli: [first day as geologist]
me: *mouth full of dirt* the crust is the best part
@ibid78: "WHAT?!" - a dinosaur that just found out what cars run on
@johngaysee: If I were Luke Skywalker it would have taken me about six minutes to turn R2-D2 into a bong.
@gavinspeiller: Anyone under the age of 21 should be legally required to end every sentence with the phrase "but there's a good chance I'm wrong about that"
@ThaJawn: *skips away in terror
@ddsmidt: The love I feel for my family is always constant. My tolerance is another matter.