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ME: omg there’s a wolf
ME: no the regular kind
@TheAlexP: * see weird traffic pattern
* turns down radio
* smoothly avoids gargantuan pothole
* runs over sign saying avoid gargantuan pothole
@LOsepyan: When someone says "surprise me", I immediately drop my pants and start singing its raining men.
@trevso_electric: turns out the 'kkk' are not just a group of guys who are very agreeable in their text messages :(
@mathtermind: Is the female equivalent of a douchebag a douchebaguette?
@Bob_Janke: [teaching my dog to shake hands]
NO! Firmer than that. Want them to take you seriously?