@longwall26: *gets dragged out of daycare* DON'T LISTEN TO THEM! IT'S NOT A CHOO-CHOO! IT'S A SPOON!! IT'S STRAINED CARROTS IN A SPOO
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@lovemyboots111: Ladies, if your man says he'll fix it, he will. There's no reason to remind him every 6 months.
@heyjaywolff: "Alexa, lock the door" - me to my friend alexa because computers locking doors is LITERALLY HOW TERMINATOR STARTED
@ShockTartBionic: I'm like Jason Bourne, only I'm not looking for exits in each room.. I'm looking for outlets & phone chargers.