Parents yelling “I’m not going to ask you again” at their kids, will definitely be asking them again
[god inventing cows]
angels: *nodding* cheese
You Might Also Like
THIS IS THE BEST THING IVE SEEN ALL DAY 😂
The happiest little bagel
Dating – Do you want to share my cheesecake?
Married- Touch my cheesecake and I’ll end you.
I stopped using a CONDOM after NIVEA started offering 48 Hours protection
Why protect myself Twice?😕😒
Sorry that I passed you vapor rub instead of lip balm but your lips do look as robust as fortified wine now…Does that sting?
Me: [when I like someone on Twitter] you’re a wonderful human being and I love you
Me: [when I like someone in real life] *velociraptor noises*
Today, I saw a sign outside a dental office that said “We do our business in your mouth” and I haven’t stopped laughing.
) ) )
) ( ) )
if white people /
invaded half of / __
the world for / |
spices, why do /——
they not use it /