What do we want?
-SHITTY MUSIC COMPILATIONS!
When do we want them?
-NOW! THAT’S WHAT I CALL MUSIC
*grandpa in hospice*
“son your generation relies on technology too much”
*pulls the plug*
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*At an auction*
Me: So…I’m outta cash. 😬
Host: What now? 🤨
Me *bids farewell*
canadian assassins are called killergrams
Friday night is my weekly time to ponder…which do I hate more: my friends, or having to make new friends?
Jehovah Witnesses are excited because now they Know y’all are gonna be home when they come knocking on the door.
4: can we name the baby Yoko?
Me: well Yoko is a Japanese name
4: if the baby is Japanese can we name it Yoko?
I’m finally putting that giant exercise ball to use, and my core is hurting from laughing at Toddler Dodgeball.
On the periodic table, the elements are represented by two groups. The symbols and the atomic number.
Law and Order: Atomic Mass Unit
“No retreat, no surrender!” -senior citizen who doesn’t know how to put their scooter in reverse and just plows over everything.
THIRD RULE OF FIGHT CLUB: Only one juice box per person.