Guys are probably not very good at Yoga, mainly because every move for them would be called ” The uncomfortable Sausage”

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I keep my wine glasses on the top shelf to make sure I stretch daily.


Nothing sneaks up on you quite like the age where people give you a bird feeder as a gift.


My husband and I have reached the age that neither of us will get up to investigate even the strangest of noises.


[ice fishing]

*pulling on rod* whoa nelly that’s a big ice


WebMD is a Choose Your Own Adventure book where every single story ends in malignant cancer


Sorry I can’t attend your Facebook event, I’ll be busy throwing myself off a cliff that day.


I don’t eat dessert for dinner nearly as much as I thought I would when I was 8


A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.


You wash your hands more now, sure, but it’s still been a year since you’ve cleaned your microwave.


I would be a bad fish.
Fishermen would be like, “omg i’m so ugly” and I’d take the bait and disagree, instead of swimming away.