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@Tups13: Her: I’m a model.
Me: You look so real!
@GamerPres2020: I keep getting questions about whether or not I'm actually running for president. The answer is yes. And on top of that, I'm holding a knife, so I'm running even faster than all the other candidates.
@KarenReneK: Me: Remind me of your name again?
Ben: It's Ben
Me: one week since you looked at me...
@thestlouisan: Oh, lovely. You're doing your jogging in the street. Where cars drive.
@BoomBoomBetty: E.T. would be a much shorter and different movie today when Elliott tells everyone it‘s his emotional support alien and they immediately back off.
@rebrafsim: M: Wanna try tantrum sex?
W: You mean "tantric"?
M: *stomps feet* Fine! We'll do it your way!