jewelry making tip: a simple can of gold spraypaint can turn a chicken nugget into a gold nugget
HER: tell me about yourself
ME: I have a cat
M: he likes music
M: we’re in a band
M: called Mewtallica
H: ok bye
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When you say “You’re gonna hate me for this” you’re making an awfully large assumption that I don’t hate you already
A closed mouth gathers no fries.
I just used Quandary in casual conversation, like some sort of philosophical genius, and everyone laughed and then I ran back to my computer to make sure I used it correctly and I did, so you may call me Professor.
[seeing anyone after googling something you didn’t know five minutes ago]: hello you ignorant piece of shit
coworker asked me if I needed a hug and now he doesn’t work here because people that are on fire can’t work.
be smart 😌
Why do they call it multiple personality disorder and not being a people-person?