@AlexvanBeek: Hey, Facebook. Dead people can't read your RIP shoutouts, because death.
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@stevevsninjas: Shout out to countless marine organisms who died, accreted on the seafloor, and compacted for eons so I could drive my Escalade to Kmart.
@dafloydsta: WIFE: Just face it, it's a lost cause WILE E COYOTE: *sifting through Acme bills* You could be a little more supportive, Janet