@tylerschmall: Hi, fire department? My cat is in a tree. Television has taught me that this is your problem.
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@scorpiusryan21: Surprised to hear five people were shot at a Chris Brown show, most notably because why were there that many people at a Chris Brown show?
@behindyourback: While I appreciate that you're bringing sexy back, if we're not also discussing who took sexy away, we're only enabling future sexy problems
@OctopusCaveman: Having sex is like riding a bike. When you’re over 30 nobody wants to watch you do it unless you’re a professional.
@TheFraudMallu: My grandmother reads obituary column in the newspaper everyday. It is pretty much like searching for your childhood friends on Facebook.