@Dawn_M_: Homeless people are so lucky. They don't have to pay rent and can eat as many pigeons as they want.
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@iRowlf: Air Bud trembles in fear after the opposing team drapes a basketball jersey over a vacuum cleaner and puts it on their starting lineup.
@HorryPuttor: The Hogwarts teachers must have felt so stupid when their traps designed to keep Voldemort from the stone were beaten by three 11 year olds
@junejuly12: Calories in one pistachio: 4 Calories burned opening one pistachio: 2,753 Take that, kale.