@ShesARealGenius

How deep is your love?
Please show all work.

You Might Also Like

@MaraWilson

FRIEND: Want to do Escape the Room?

ME: Dude like 90% of my life is me trying to figure out how to get out of places I don’t want to be

@KeetPotato

[1st day as bank robber]
leader: i told you to put tape over their mouths
me: [still struggling to find end of the tape] just gimme a second

@Becky_DDB

Science tip: you can distinguish an alligator from a crocodile by paying attention to whether the animal sees you later or in a while.

@distracted_monk

Pasta aisle is cleaned out because that’s all most people know how to cook.

@joshgondelman

Accidentally opened Excel. Decided to roll with it and get my life together. See you all never.

@Birdhumms

*At the checkout

Cashier: How many croissants?

M: Four

*Cashier eyes up the crumbs on my face.

M: Um six

@WheelTod

“Good parenting isn’t giving your kid everything she needs, but giving her the tools to get it for herself” I say, handing my 6yo a crossbow

@_b1p0larbear

Long story short: Always check headphones for spiders before you put them on.