@TheBoydP: I always feel better when my doctor says something is normal for my age but then think dying will also be normal for my age at some point.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@clindsaysway: An obese old man who breaks into your house at night? A tiny flying woman who buys your dead teeth? It's a wonder children can sleep at all.
@darinlovesbacon: Do you single people want to know what marriage is like? Imagine having an argument in 1993 and talking about it once a week until you die
@Rica_Bee: Me: why are there so many rednecks at this bar Vampire: *shifting guiltily* haha yeah weird
@FuckabillyRex: Paid a mime fifty bucks to follow me around for a day and do the jerk off motion every time I speak.