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@Marlebean: I call all my kids "baby" so I don't confuse their names...
Like a playa
@GayAtHomeDad: When I die, before my will is read, I want my entire Google search history revealed and whoever is left in the room gets it all.
@Stella1070: Amy Winehouse's final album was "recorded before her death." Thanks for the clarification.
@Stap_Jr: I’ve seen enough movies to know that when you wake up in a hospital bed, you rip all the cords off because you’ve got work to do.
Me: *confidently walking up to the counter after they got my order wrong* i'd like to speak to wendy
@KentWGraham: My wife and I trade off on bathroom cleaning. She avoids it one weekend, I avoid it the next.