@Elizasoul80: I can't believe I live in a world where our only defense against a blizzard is buying extra milk.
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@withanewname: "Son, you can practice the sex on holes in trees" "DAD?!" [next day] "Where you going with that broom handle?" "Checkin for squirrels"
@dulcetry: One time I saw a biker's funeral procession and realized even dead people are cooler than me.
@schumoo: My plans for world domination will have to be put on hold while I try to open this package of batteries.