@sarahclazarus: I can’t stop canceling dates. it feels incredible. this guy thought he was gonna find out how many siblings I have and now that mystery will follow him to his grave
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@murrman5: me: how bout a show like greys anatomy but at an animal hospital producer: they're all vets? me shaking head no: they're all animals
@abhorrent_wife: All it took was a skirt and one strong gust of wind and all of a sudden, my spirit animal is Hello Kitty.