@LuvPug: I could probably survive about a week in the wilderness eating only the food I spill on my shirt any given day.
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@daplusk: [on 1st date] Me: Have you ever flown to Paris on a private jet before? Her: No, I'd love to Me: Same Me: *shows photo of cat* this is Tim
@Book_Krazy: [1st date] Him: We share perfect chemistry! Me: *but all I hear is the word "share" as I create a fortress around my nachos with my hands*
@jonnysun: the next time u see a fork in the road, just try to remeber that at least, no mater wat u did, u werent the person who tried to eat the road