Currently on minute 137 of Easy~Bake Oven cupcakes. I’ll be live Tweeting their status as they crisp up over the next day or two.
I don’t get why he counts the beer before he leaves to work… There’s never any left when he comes home.
You Might Also Like
Me: Don’t you hate it when you walk into a room but don’t remember why you’re there?
Executioner: Ugh the WORST
When someone compliments you, look them in the eye and calmly state, “I refuse to accept this.”
Then walk away forever.
Me: can i play music
Funeral director: that’s not appropriate
Me: nana would’ve wanted it
CD player: someBODY once told me
Is anyone else worried that software engineers with no people skills are teaching our future robots people skills
In 1911: Dracula used to drink virgin girls blood … In 2012: he died of hunger.
She said I’m ‘barely tolerable,’ which means there’s still a chance
what idiot called it a chicken instead of an eggplant
Who even thought of soup? Were they like, you know what this perfectly good meal needs? Water.
Women like men with an accent, not an Axe scent