66% of Canadians were unimpressed with “The Revenant”, or as it’s known in Canada, “Pretty Average Day”
I don’t like Haiku because you have to do poetry AND math.
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In a parallel universe nobody can park.
These cat babies are straight up gangsta. I’m going to name them all after Friends characters. The one I hate will be Ross.
Early Bird: *gets worm*
Late Bird: *snacking on Doritos*
Early Bird: SONOFA
at banned camp,
I felt really excluded.
diet tip: your pants will never get too tight if you don’t wear any.
“Hey baby, what dat mouff do?”
It eats. It eats a lot. That’s what.
I bet Usher shows everyone to their seats at his concerts.
Grad school is my excuse for everything. No text back? Grad school. Havent called in weeks? Grad school. I ate your last donut? Grad school!
Seems a lot like 2021 keeps asking, “What would 2020 do?”