@NoToFeminism: I don’t need feimsm i like my men to be REAL MEN! the worst day of my life was when i realised i had mistakenly married a big bag of oranges
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@alexlumaga: Me: Quick question: Did you ask me to help raise your baby, or help “braise” your baby? Her: Are you grilling something out back? That smells delicious Me: Please answer my question first
@chrisdowning: Pro Tip: If you stand outside a restaurant wearing a red jacket, people will literally just give you their car.
@3sunzzz: You smell wonderful. Can I ask what you're wearing? Sure, it's the perfume sample on page 49 in April's Cosmo.
@juliussharpe: The Super Bowl is a great opportunity to let 200 million people know your ad agency sucks.