@WhaJoTalkinBout: I had to call some kid's mom last night to tell her he's selling pot, and that it's waaay overpriced.
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@OctopusCaveman: I have this awesome app that shows me what I would look like as a fat person. It’s called Camera.
@Tmoney68: In hell, it's always the last minute of a staff meeting and someone raises his hand for "one more quick question."
@MelKassel: *night falls, the full moon rises* ME: go, please! i don't want you to see me...like...this HIM: omg what's happening ME: *asleep by 10 pm*