@decentbirthday: I have no idea what she's talking about.
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@AimeeHelene1: That moment when your ID badge doesn't work & you wonder: Did I get fired? Can I go back to bed now? Will my 401k sustain my food addiction?
@LostCatDog: You can lead a horse to water, but you probably can't do it as well as Sneaky Gary, the serial horse drowner.
@wickedimproper: People who say having a dog is nothing like having kids have obviously never been to one of my dog’s piano recitals.