*breathes on window creating condensation
*starts to write in condensation
*head slams into window and breaks it
I hope that if I ever have to call 9-1-1 for an emergency an essential oil person is not the operator.
Help, I’m hurt.
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7 barges into bathroom while I’m showering, laughs & says “I saw your peanut.”
He either mispronounced a word or made a hurtful observation.
I feel like the Ghostbusters are too proud they “ain’t afraid a no ghosts.”
It’s your job.
My exterminator doesn’t keep telling me he’s not afraid of spiders.
Fun game: Order food to be delivered to your mobile home and then lead the delivery driver on a high-speed chase through town.
When I was 6 my cousin stole my boomerang. The next day his parents died in a car crash. Andy, if you’re reading this, I want my boomerang.
i still think this meme was really special
I hate it when I forget my password and the security questions make me relive my entire childhood.
Or as I like to call it;
The wonder years
Wonder why she is mad this time
Wonder why my stuff is on the lawn
My dad use to take me to the circus to see the tattooed man and the bearded lady. Now, I can see them anytime shopping at Walmart.
KID IN PARK [crying] I think my mum might of left me here
ME: Oh no!
WIFE: Talk to him
ME: Hey, listen kid *kneels down* it’s might HAVE