@2browneyedboys: I just got a headache from bending down but yeah, age is just a number.
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@Tmoney68: My next door neighbor is constantly blaring loud music by a certain white rapper, keeping me awake at night. He's become my Eminemesis.
@pizza_dragon: Hi kids I'm Keanu Reeves here to tell you that speed is never cool unless you're a professional SWAT member on a bus that's about to blow up
@blainecapatch: whenever god closes a door he opens a window because he's taking a pretty nasty shit in there.
@lgbk44: Avoid office small talk by maintaining that facial expression between first sneeze and second sneeze