Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Follow us on Instagram. In case you are wondering "But Why!". We post nice "night mode" funny tweets that are easy on your eyes when you are lying down on your side and night and scrolling through your phone while trying to get numbed up and forget the day. Click here to follow us

@FunkyFresh_79: "I JUST WANT TO PUT A BABY IN YOU!"

-me, trying to put a crib together

“I JUST WANT TO PUT A BABY IN YOU!” -me, trying to put a crib together
1 comments

COMMENTS

YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE

@AndrewNadeau0: When I’m mad at someone I say “no pun intended” when there wasn’t a pun and leave them trying to find it.

1

@SerialFuckup: Today's life lesson: "I've learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing them off is a piece of cake."

1

@ImABaconDonut: Me: Thanks for the sex. Me: You're welcome. Me: Maybe next time we can have another person in the room. Me: That'd be nice.

1

@heytherejeffro: Pretty sure the "FINISH HIM" guy from Mortal Kombat is giving relationship advice to every girl I date.

46

@MountainDouche: I have a question for you guys. After the door bell rings, how long do I have to wait to turn the TV volume back up and make any movement?

22
↑