@sixfootcandy: I like to yell “Stranger danger!”whenever my boss introduces me to a new client.
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@Darlainky: [at lunch with friend] Friend: ... but you didn't hear that from me. Me: [looking up from my phone] Hear what? Friend: Exactly *winks*
@goodhairperson: I've decided I want a sad funeral. None of this upbeat "celebration of life" shit. I want sobbing, ppl vomiting w grief, at least 2 suicides