@JenAshleyWright

I made a cool diagram of how the Spanish Flu worked in 1918.

You Might Also Like

@Artemis_Ascends

Fair warning. If you schedule your child’s birthday party before 11am, they will receive a book about where babies come from.

@Mr_Kapowski

“Will you marry me?”

“The cookie was poison”

“The lotto numbers will never win”

Examples of why I got fired from writing fortune cookies

@ShortSleeveSuit

WAITER: what can I get you?

ME [noticing a man rubbing his stomach heartily]: ooh I’ll have what he’s having

WAITER: right away sir *starts rubbing my belly*

@AnnaKei26

According to the New England Journal of Medicine, the blood alcohol level is to be measured in Lohans now

@TheCiscoKidder

My wife acts like she wants to have sex, but then we don’t. I googled it, it’s called cuddling.

@Kneevyl

If it weren’t for dating sites, I’d still have some self-esteem. Thank God, it’s all gone now.

@crylenol

*Jesus emerges from tomb*
Wow was that 3 days? Holy cow. I was marathoning The Wire. You guys seen this?

@ilovepie84

Whenever I test drive a car and the Salesman decides to come along, I lock the doors lock eyes and say “We ride together, we Die together.”