@Kids_kubed
9yo: (mouths off to me)
Me:
Hubs: You’re not doing anything? At least take his iPad away.
Me: Patience
(1 hour later)
9yo: Mom! My iPad’s dead, where’s the charger?
Me: What charger?
Hubs: Nice one.
@MissSassy_Pants
I once told my mom that being the youngest child wasn’t so great because I got the least amount of time with her before she dies.
Just to show that my dark side comes from a loving place.
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@Kids_kubed
@ericsshadow
*flags down police car* how many mpg does this thing get?
@Nips_00
You rolling your eyes doesn’t mean I’m going to stop talking
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Oh no
@Puncroaker
My inability to pronounce Spanish names makes me sad, and I’m not even Jaoquin.
@NYC_Blonde
“I hate you but I love you. I miss you but you make me sick. You’re wonderful but get away from me” -My love letter to carbs
@AaronFullerton
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“Awh, are you planning something for Valentine’s?”
“No, I forgot my password. It’s the security question.”
@lovejulieacafe
If someone finds a long red hair in the meal I’ve prepared, I yell “YOU WIN” and toss them a piece of candy.
@Tmoney68
I’m going to be an “adult” film star. You’ll pay $12 to watch me struggle to pay bills, cry uncontrollably, and lie awake in bed at night.
@theleanover
I’m still not convinced Mitt Romney was born.