I have no idea what Steampunk is except that it must be healthier than Fried Punk.
I put two pairs of cargo pants in my cargo pants pockets, just in case I need more cargo pants.
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People who have wheels on their office chair, how do you get any work done?
Me: It’ll just make mom grumpy, so don’t tell her that the dishwa…..
4 year old: MOM! DISHWASHER’S BROKEN!
*bludgeons you with a block of cheese
Hey people with one syllable names…… Good job ruining the Happy Birthday song. Jerks
And that’s when he realized… HE FORGOT TO ENABLE WIFI AND WATCHED 5 SEASONS USING HIS DATA PLAN
[everyone screams in terror]
Your outfit says you work in an office, but your shoes say it might have a pole in it
You really shouldn’t drive when you’re tired.
Mario is a game where you save a girl from the terrible fate of hanging with a dude who owns a castle
I made a graph showing my past relationships. It has an ex axis and a why axis.