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@3sunzzz: I shaved my legs and now my socks keep falling down.
Life is hard.
@TheDreamGhoul: The 9th rule of fight club is no roller skates. honestly guys I don't know why we keep having to say this.
@MrGeorgeWallace: I wanna congratulate Disney on outbidding me for Fox. I realize now that my offer, $13,000 and an IOU for $81-billion scrawled on a Arby's bag in crayon, was unrealistic and whatnot.
@paul_lander: Who says Republicans aren't into recycling?
Mitt Romney's thinking of running for President, again.
@JohnLemongrab: "open up, this is the police!"
"well, I've felt alone since my girlfriend left me, I'm sad all the time-"
"no the door open up the door"
@MsSkarsgaard: My kids fought over their school bags touching in the trunk if you needed a reason to pull out.