You can tell a lot about my BF by the way he’s giving me the silent treatment. He’s doing it wrong. I’m doing it right but can’t tell him.
I shaved my legs today and drew the hair back on. I don’t get it, eyebrow ladies, I don’t get it.
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WHERE IS THE CHRISTMAS TREE EMOJI THIS IS A GODDAMN WAR ON CHRISTMAS IVE HAD ENOUGH OF TH– oh there it is
Dating is basically lying to women about how you like to travel.
Unless you’re a toddler heading towards traffic I’m not running after you.
In Canada at our Black Friday sales we fight to see who gets to hold the door open for others.
I always wanted to be on Family Feud but there were never 5 people in my family speaking to each other at one time.
I like Horror Movies for the first 20 minutes when everyone is just hanging out and having a good time.
One time I made a snowman and gave him a cucumber nose. Carrot noses are the standard protocol but I’m what u would call a rebel.
Panel: We’re looking for someone with intensity, focus, passion and drive
Me: *adjusting volume on Ipod* sorry what?