@ReeseButCallMeV: I taught my 1yo how to turn on my mother-in-law's dishwasher since she only uses it for storage.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@audipenny: A snake is what happens when a string goes "what if I was alive and had a weird mad looking head"
@smilely_gal: 7: "Mama, if someone licked the treadmill, would that someone get sick?" Me: "Are you the someone?" 7: "Maybe" Holy hell.
@Fickle_Filly: If you pull out a knife and start sharpening it, people soon stop telling you about their plans for Valentine’s Day.