@ADDiane: I try to compartmentalize, but then I remember that's how they built the titanic.
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@david8hughes: [bank robbery] Robber 1: put money in the bag Robber 2: how come u get to be robber 1? Robber 4: how do u think I feel. There's only 3 of us
@: my coworker started crying bc her bf broke up w her thru text and my manger said “thats why we stay off our phones at work”
@knot_eye: Me: You say all the right things. Her: I didn't say anything. Me: Shhh Don't ruin this for me.
@envydatropic: The forecast isn't calling for rain so I'm just going to wash my car to prove the weatherman wrong