I want to apologize to D.C. Comics for saying that the Lex Luther becoming president story arc could never happen in real life.
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The human brain is so fascinating. It operates 24/7 from the day we were born and only stops when ur taking a test or talking to someone attractive.
Me yesterday: I’m gonna get so much done during this quarantine
Me today: 2pm time for bed
Me: Talk dirty to me
Him: I’m gonna get you in the sheets and we’re going to bed early
M: God yes
H: I won’t set an alarm
M: Don’t stop!
I switched to watching horror movies, because literally anything is less scary.
Niggas be like I want a girl that rocks Jordan’s, plays video games, and watches sports with me” wtf? You want a boyfriend nigga
Guy threw a banana peel out the window into my lane 2day. Yrs of practice paid off and I arrived to work safely. Thank you Mario Kart.
A penny for your thoughts, a dollar if you keep them to yourself.
“Daddy, where do babies come from?”
“How do they get inside?”
CAN’T U ASK WHY THE SKY IS BLUE HAVEN’T U WONDERED ABOUT THAT
Be grateful for those who keep your secrets.
That way you don’t have to kill them & go to prison.