@Jenn_H_Scott: I want to be the kind of person who eats half a grapefruit for breakfast and runs every morning but I also want to be happy
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@LoveMeNowDad: A microwave with three only buttons. 1. Hot Pocket 2. Pizza Rolls 3. 4 Hot Pockets and 60 Pizza Rolls
@maddyalou: Son: Will you please just try to act normal today? Me: You're going to have to be more specific.
@telizs3: Is it wrong to laugh at the clerk who asked if I wanted a 2-year warranty on an electronic toy my kid will lose interest in in 2 weeks?