LASAGNA IS ONE OF THE WORST SPELLED WORDS THAT SHIT IS ABSOLUTELY PREPOSTEROUS, SHOULD BE LASONYA BUT UR ALL SCARED TO TALK ABOUT IT, SCARED OF WHAT COULD HAPPEN
I was asked to babysit once but it didn’t go very well.
You’re not meant to sit on them.
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Me, to teenage son: You just keep trying and trying until it eventually goes in
Wife, whispering to me: What the hell were you teaching him about
Me: USB sticks
Wife: Oh thank god
Me: *climbing down* The best revenge is living in a well.
Friend: That’s not the saying!
Me: *shouting up* You’ll all be sorry!
Helen Hunt but only when Helen hungry.
The ladies call me Space Mountain…
…cause I’m a 5 hour wait and a 3 minute ride.
In my opinion, we should keep on eating meat until the planet runs out. And then, and only then, do we start on the children.
Not going to any more weddings or funerals. Please keep that in mind, friends who are considering getting married or dying.
What’s the name of that Adam Sandler’s movie were he plays an immature adult?
I’m not superstitious, I’m just kindastitious!!!