@iGreenMonk: I watch birds sometimes and wonder, "If I could fly, whose car would I crap on?"
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@Darlainky: Confession: Half the time I told my sister’s friends she wasn’t home it was so I didn’t have to take the phone to her.
@dril: i will not close my account until the sport of golf is rightfully named "golfball" like the other ball sports
@Fred_Delicious: Bruce Willis is at the supermarket, standing by the cucumbers & laughing hysterically, pointing at them with tears streaming down his face
@jwoodham: "Friends" ended 10 years ago today, but thanks to television, "me having friends" ended long before that.