me: *turns around in swivel chair*
I guess you never expected to see ME again…
Boss: Must we do this every Monday?
If Bruce Willis does any more Die Hard movies it will just be 90 minutes of him sitting in a rocking chair waiting to die from the flu.
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WHAT DO WE WANT!?
A forum for passive aggressive behavior!
WHEN do we want it?
NOW would be great but you seem busy sooo whatever.
Commercial for Twitter dot com:
*man yells nonsense out his window*
Narrator: Don’t you wish there were a better way?
We don’t have Taco Bell in South Africa because this country’s been through too much already.
Priests should not have to live in a state of forced celibacy, but be free to marry and let celibacy slowly descend upon them the usual way.
I hate that when something is difficult, people say “it’s no picnic,” as if picnics are just some walk in the park.
Some dude just called me an idiot for not agreeing with him. What he doesn’t know is I’ve been calling myself that since we started talking.
When children vomit, sometimes it sounds like they’re saying the names of Ikea furniture.
Just saw a squirrel jump about 15 feet from one tree to another. He is now my new emergency contact.
You don’t realize how old a movie is until you see the computer in it