If cupcakes could talk, boy, there sure would be a lot of screaming in my house.

You Might Also Like


*First day as a boxing cornerman*

Me: So did you guys even try to talk this out first or what


The next time you hear a celebrity saying, “we’ll get through this together,” send them your electric bill with a thank you note.


My pants embarrassed me in front of a chick again. How many times must I tell them that it’s rude to point???


My mom just learned how to text. And her text to me said “can you hear me?”


Little known Chinese proverb – He who walks barefoot in a dog’s backyard will be sorry


my head, thawed from cryogenic storage 1000 years in future: boy, i could go for a pizza

lab staff: what is ..peet-za?

my head: throw me out the window right now i’m not even exaggerating


Depression is an evolutionary adaptation, predators can’t eat you if you don’t leave your house