@OhNoSheTwitnt: If Pokémon has taught me anything it's that if I see a cute animal I should force my cat to fight it until it's weak enough to enslave.
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@meganamram: I can't believe it's 2012 and street signals are still only telling white people to cross
@lemonmartinis: Dude that's not a tire swing its a warning to other tires that trespass in my yard
@Okeating: I didn't take my husband's name when I got married. I figured it'd be confusing if we were both called Keith.