@sploosk: If someone ever intimidates you, remember that they're 70% water. Are you scared of water? Well you should be. 400,000 people drown per year
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@causticbob: If my iPod doesn't work in the next few minutes, I'm throwing it in the river. It can either sync or swim.
@PeaceInTruth1: Coworker: Stop Me: collaborate and listen Coworker: Don't Me: you forget about me Coworker: Hey! Me: teacher, leave them kids alone
@: doctor: i'm sorry but you have 3 months left to live me: [i slide a $5 bill across the table] make it 1 month
@pixelatedboat: Clinton fan: Emails? That's all you've got? Me: She sold the Saudis the jets that are massacring Yemenis Clinton fan: Emails? That's all you