I love the people in parking lots with “free kittens” signs because I too feel that kittens shouldn’t be oppressed.
If something happened to me today, my legacy would be how much my kids say “like”
You Might Also Like
“At least you’ll be safe from zombies,” I whisper to myself as I struggle to get my head out of the armhole of my shirt.
After grandpa’s unfortunate steamroller incident last year, man crush Monday is always a difficult time for me and my family.
When my sugar daddy told me no, I asked my sugar mommy, and my sugar daddy found out and now I’m sugar grounded.
knights of the ikea table
*presses button for soundproof backseat divider
Wife: “HOW MUCH DID-”
*presses button for soundproof passenger seat divider
Me: are you married?
Me: your wife know about that?
Apparently, the latest gadget used by suicide bombers around the world is a vest completely made of Galaxy Note 7s.
There’s a giant exploding ball of fire in sky every day, and we’re just supposed to be cool with it? Hell no, I’m not into that at all.