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@WickedCynic: If the guy behind me stands any closer I'm going to go in for a hug.
@RedRegenerated: WIFE: Stop taking things the wrong way.
ME: [swallows suppository]
@kumailn: It's fine to eat chicken with skin but serve beef with skin and everybody just starts freaking out.
@DothTheDoth: Of course I have body issues, I can't explode into a thousand crows.
@GrabTheWEness: It was an unfortunate incident, but at least Doug learned he should never lick his light saber after using it to cut chocolate cake.